If slow and steady won the race, I’d have a trophy room full by now.

28 03 2010

I’m about to tell you a dark, shameful secret that may leave you stunned and speechless: I’m lazy.

It’s one of the hardest things for me to admit. Even when I do one not-lazy thing in a day, I’ll exaggerate it and then go on talking about all the necessary things I did like eating and walking to school. Maybe I’ll say “Oh, I didn’t do much” instead, but I always have make it sound like I did something, for fear of people losing interest in me.

I could say since the last time I posted I’ve had birthday parties to go to and a show (Derren Brown @ The Bristol Hippodrome, absolutely fantastic) but they’re no excuse for neglecting this blog. The truth is, I’m just horridly lazy.

I haven’t re-finished the first chapter of the Spider Network yet because I’m so great at procrastinating, but I have got about half of it now, and I’ll be working on it today and probably tomorrow too. It’ll be up sometime in the week, I pinky swear! Keep checking back for it!

I’d like to thank the small handful of people who’ve been checking this blog every now and then over the past few weeks. The internet won’t let me see who you are, but I can see on my stats that there have been people looking at this blog, either from the link on my Twitter or without a “referrer” so thanks!

P.S. I’ll be making a new banner for the blog later in the week.

P.P.S. I now have a new email address – OlympicKnitter@googlemail.com


Kids having kids.

26 01 2010

A girl in my neighbourhood gave birth about a week ago. She’s 12 years old. There are 15 people living in her 3 bedroom house. It’s filthy and there are now 3 young children there. Today the 12 year old mother’s mother got arrested for possession of drugs. There are still a lot of addicts living in that house.

For a reason I don’t know, Social Services haven’t got involved. It’s ridiculous. There is a twelve year old trying to look after baby amongst a houseful of drug addicts, alcoholics and lazy, unemployed adults who aren’t much more capable of looking after children themselves. To be quite honest, it makes me hate the way things are run around here. There was a gun scare at my school on Friday, and an old friend has apparently¬†committed¬†suicide.

It’s all a little surreal. Just-turned-teens having kids, guns, suicide. They’re all things I thought I would never come across. You see things on the news and hear stories, but there’s a little part that says “don’t listen, it’s the media” and you go on with your life thinking these things are just anomalies. Shocking, yes, but rare and unlikely. It’s starting to dawn on me that whilst there are still trees that look beautiful at sunset and fields that haven’t been cut for decades and all manner of beautiful things, the world can be dark. It can be scary, and there are a great many things in it that contain no beauty at all, no matter how hard you search for something good in a bad situation.

This also leads me on to saying that I’ve been fifteen years of age for well over a month now. I’ve seen more unpleasant things in the last few weeks than I can remember, and it makes me wonder if they were always there and I just never noticed because I was lost in my own childish world. I can’t stop myself from growing up, but I won’t forget how to have fun. I won’t forget that when making an outfit for a child’s art project you can put the sheet over yourself and run around making ghost noises for a good ten minutes. I’ll keep myself aware of war and poverty and terrible things like the Haitian earthquake, but twenty years from now I’ll still be able to look at a tree without thinking of a table.

I won’t forget fun.